Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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