Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
