Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
