is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
