I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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