Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
