In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
