I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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