We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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