I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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