Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
