Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
foreskin is a definite game changer
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
