He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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