Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
we should paint friendship bongs
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
