Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
