Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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