Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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