I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
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