Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize