"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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