Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
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