i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
