Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
