it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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