And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
