awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
