There is no way he is gay with that hair.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I smell like Dick and happiness
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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