So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
