Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
