weddingsv make me drug and hornr
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
