i can't believe i had my finger in that
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
