He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
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