She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
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