come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I could fuck to npr.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
