Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
