Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
