windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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