you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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