you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
