did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
