last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
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