I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
