"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
