He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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