I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
