So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
