I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
