oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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