"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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