Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
